Tuesday, April 7, 2009

A.I. Minus the Live Blogging

Today's road, which I knew little of when I awoke this morning, held a 2 hour cleaning sprint at the tail end of it therefore leaving little time for preparing dinner and cleaning the kitchen before American Idol.
Besides, we've already discussed my ability to tolerate commercials, so as it turns out, I'm catching up now on what must be one of the greatest television additions to our time, the DVR and will be in "real time" via DVR playback.

Tonight's premise (songs from the year you were born) holds potential. Tonight's hit or miss will surely depend on song choice. Then again, how does that make it different? Each week one or all judges at some point throw out a you've got to bring it with song choice, and if it's Randy it's preceded by look, dog, and followed by a I'm just not feeling the swagger.

1980 Danny did well, sang the mess out of his choice "Stand by Me," but his ceiling is so low due to the Taylor Hicks' Effect (THE). Danny's cute, charming, sweet, genuine, and incredibly talented as a singer; however, older than me (standing over 10 years older than my students this year), he surely cannot reign as American Idol in today's musical kingdom. Judges' comments must be noted--you "turned it on its head" and "made it your own," and "you did your own thing and you did it well." Explanation follows with Kris discussion.

1985 Kris Allen--Your parents would be just as happy if you were a taxi cab driver? Ahh, the beauty of mothers. Kris, cutie, you remind me of a little brother, and surely the teens are falling all over you (See Exhibit A--girls swooning around the stage). I like you. I won't take the time to call in and vote for you though--sorry.

Even more important, our judges are truly outdoing themselves in contradiction this year. Their comments reveal that he did indeed "reinterpret it in that way" and "you did change it up to make it your own," yet at the end of the day, they decided, "When something is already so great, you don't need to change the arrangement." Really, guys, I hope you make use of your personal DVRs and huddle for a playback party to watch yourselves unfold in undermining your own commentary. Care for me to read your palm? I predict you will complete reverse this idea, not at the end of the show, but with the very next contestant!

Side note--Cheers to you Word of the Season! Simon's "indulgent" takes home the "W."
Perhaps I will begin writing that on student papers. Scandalous!

1984--Lil, girl, taking on Tina? You've heard Randy, Paula, and Simon lose their grits when contestants attempt Whitney; imagine what happens when you take on Tina.
(Nice work, cameraman, taking leg shots to remind us of the hardest working legs in Hollywood.)

I can't take this anymore. Paula criticizes, "You needed to lead Ricky and the band into creating your own niche of a song that is so classic...Tina Turner" and Simon warns, "You've got to start becoming original."

I get it. They need to rework songs, but only songs that can be reworked, songs that are "already so great." Avoid Whitney, Tina, the Beatles, and the likes.
They told Kris that "you lost you" when he rearranged his song choice. They suggested that Lil "become original" when choosing to perform Tina's "What's Love Got to do With It?" in a manner honoring her greatness.
I can't work with such ambiguity. It's what's keeping me off the show really. I'd try out and most likely make it otherwise.

Just to note--I should be grading right now.

1986 Anoop--probably boring, but he was a cute baby. This is sweet Anoop. My inner Cyndi Lauper toasts your efforts but needs that raspy voice inside the multi-colored-hair kindred spirit melting me instead. "You controlled the song" Anoop--so, what does that even mean?

1985--Scott--looks so much older than Kris. song choice--Quaint? Yes. Showcases your voice? Yes. A hit I'd hope you'd sing on the American Idol tour should I win free tickets because I won't spend the money on it myself? No.
Boring.

1992 Allison--choosing Bonnie Raitt for her voice is perfect! I wonder as I begin the performance though, will she sound too close? Will it be "original" enough? Will she attempt to change "something already so great" and fail?
Regardless, what is she wearing? Perhaps it helped make "the adult content of the song...young." Kara, Randy, Paula, and Simon (KRaPS I shall call you)--I need a clear focus and standard. Publish a judging rubric to follow. You are all over the map. How is "I can't make you love me if you don't" an over-our-heads piece of "adult content?" Have you ever talked to a high-schooler?
Paula, she added tenderness to a song that is so gut-wrenching and you applaud this? Perhaps this is where I fail as a critique of the contestants on this show. If the song was set out to be gut-wrenching, shouldn't it be just that?

Hey, American Idol producers, end with your two greatest--good strategy.

1985 Matt, honey, this is a cheese 80s pick, but I like you. Your triple threat, outfit, dimples, and groove (and to add a fourth from the judges--incredible vocals) combined for a sexy performance. Did the producers know you'd nail it and need no time for judge commentary?
Still a fan, babe.

That DVR that I glorified earlier, now a thorn in my side cutting off Adam. I'm off to hunt down the video playback online and perhaps revise this post to insure the impossibility of its being labeled "indulgent."

1 comment:

Blue-Eyed Bride said...

My favorite Simon word is "abysmal." :) Nice recap!